Thursday, November 08, 2007

24 Season 7: Delayed... Again

Looks like FOX doesn't think the Writers Guild of America strike is going to be finished any time soon. Yesterday, FOX announced their updated Spring schedule which included the premiere of 24 being suspended indefinitely:

According to TV Guide:
"The seventh season premiere of 24 is being postponed," explains the network, "to ensure that Day 7 can air uninterrupted, in its entirety."

Shoosh! Maybe they can rest easier now that Kiefer's jail-time won't screw much up.

Friday, October 26, 2007

24 Season 7: The Trailer

Ready for 24's Season 7 trailer? Either go to, or watch below:

Just like the trailer for Season 6, I think this effort is great. However, I'm VERY skeptical about how it will turn out. Those who make trailers don't get paid mega-bucks for nothing. They're marketers. That said, what sticks out from so far?

Tony's a New Man
Left for dead, Tony has a new haircut and some type of vendetta. Positioning Tony as the baddie for this season will definitely get people talking ... talking instead of asking, wtf. Yes, he was zipped up in a body bag. But, at the same time, Jack has died twice and HE'S still around. Sigh. Don't worry. Either Tony will die mid-way through the season, for good... or will become good again. Either way, he's reporting to someone.

CTU is Gone
Thank God. Unfortunately, Chloe and Bill aren't. Yes, you saw a glimpse of them with their bluetooth headsets on. Maybe they work for Dell now, selling computers to the Government. Big computers. Computers that house the CIP Firewall – the latest and greatest made up technojargon on 24. Good to see that we can still be fed lameness.

Jack Don't Care
Hell no Jack doesn't regret the decisions he's made. He's just fine with losing his wife. Estranging his daughter. Pushing his most recent girlfriends to the brink of insanity. Torturing many, killing even more. Dude... really. He doesn't regret any of it. Eeeeexcept maybe that DUI he recently was arrested for and is going to jail because of. THAT, maybe, he regrets.

New City
Same song, new notes. Boring.

What were your thoughts?

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Jack Bauer Arrested for DUI

"24" star Kiefer Sutherland wasn't trying to save the world when he made an illegal U-turn in the wee hours.

Instead, the Emmy-winning actor was arrested on suspicion of drunk driving on Tuesday, Sept. 25 in West Hollywood, reports Earlier in the evening, he had attended the FOX Fall Eco-Casino party at Area nightclub.

The 40-year-old was pulled over at 1:35 a.m. on the corner of La Cienega and Beverly. A breathalyzer test showed that his blood alcohol level was above the legal .08 limit for California.

He was taken to the Hollywood Police station and booked for a misdemeanor DUI. He was released on $25,000 bail.

Sutherland is due in court on Oct. 16.

Well, this will definitely put a damper on his run for President, but it also speaks volumes about his latest round of reality. Think about it... everyone he loves dies and sometimes they come back! I'd probably be drunk-driving around LA at 1:35 a.m. if I saw Tony Almeida show up earlier that day.

I wonder how long he sat in the jailcell while someone came to get him. And while he waited, did the 24-clock beep the whole time? That could make for some interesting reality tv. Someone, please get that tape!

24 Season 7: Tony Almeida, Resident Zombie

Before the news of Tony returning broke, I thought that 24 fans were awfully lenient with the writing staff. Now, however, it appears that most suffer from the ostrich syndrome – where you stick your head in the sand to ignore what's going on. Everywhere I read, fans are rejoicing that Tony is back... from the dead. Yes, he was dead. Don't let anyone on the 24 tell you otherwise. Don't listen to the lies they're going to spin... especially when Executive Producer Howard Gordon says something like:

"That's something, obviously, we're going to have to explain away," Gordon says. "Hopefully, in the spirit of creating a good show and creating an interesting season, people will allow the fun [of '24']."

In the spirit (pun intended, I'm sure) of creating an interesting season? Let me translate that for you – in the interest of me keeping my job because we got our asses handed to us for the crap we put out there last year.

I'm bewildered that these fans are all excited about Tony returning. Really, I am. Why? BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD!!! This isn't a soap opera. This is a show that's based on the reality of a 24-hour timeline AND the notion that terrorist attacks could happen on US soil. But now we're supposed to believe that a character that was killed off in season five is just about to magically reappear?

I'm not sure how Mr. Gordon and his crew will explain what's plainly listed in the 24 recaps:

Season Five: 7:00 - 8:00 pm
7:59 P.M. – Jack enters the clinic and finds Tony and Burke on the ground. Gasping his last breath of life, Tony tells Jack that he couldn’t do it. Jack clutches Tony’s head. Tony dies, and Jack cries with him still in his arms.

Season Five: 8:00 - 9:00 pm
8:00 P.M. – As the medic workers wrap up Tony’s body, Audrey comes to tell Jack that Henderson has escaped. However, Chloe was able to decrypt a file on his computer and she found an intelligence broker named Collette Stenger who is a known associate of Bierko.

Tony dies in Jack's arms. Next episode, Tony's body is being wrapped up by medical workers.

He's dead. Tony is gone. Character written off of the show.

How can you be excited about this? This opens the flood gates of allowing the writers to do ANYTHING they want. This doesn't make for interesting television. It reeks of publicity stunt and ratings grabbing. Ultimately, it's going to make them all look like fools (if that's not too late, already).

If you're a fan and you're excited about Tony the un-dead agent, then just admit the show is lost and insanely silly. Then I won't want to sucker-punch you so bad.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

24 Season 7: Tony Almeida is Back (rolling eyes)

I will go out of my way not to blurt this out, lest someone castigate me for spoiling. But when Fox's 24 launches Season 7 on Jan. 13 and 14 with a two-night premiere, a familiar (though unexpected) face will put in an appearance. "With CTU dismantled, the show's setting moves to Washington, D.C., where Jack Bauer faces trial for his actions in the pursuit of justice," reads the Fox press release. "Bauer's day gets off to a shocking start when former colleague Tony Almeida (played by Carlos Bernard), last seen in Day 5, returns after being left for dead by a terrorist conspirator in CTU's infirmary."

Say wha?! "Tony's uncertain fate... left the door open for his return," explains exec producer Howard Gordon. "And since there was no silent clock at the conclusion of his last appearance — the 24 tribute to a major character's demise — we always kept this as a possibility." Indeed, it was widely rumored (and, I believe, perhaps even filmed) that Tony was to resurface in the final seconds of last season.

Wait until you-know-who finds out that wife Michelle herself is alive, and working as a chaplain at ER's County General!

As Jonk points out in today's earlier post – this is so asenine and ludicris that 24 not only jumps the shark, but ties a rock to it's feet and drowns itself. How in the world does Tony survive in season five and NO ONE knows about it?

Sure season six totally sucked. We all know it. Will bringing Tony back, into a season that was delayed several different times due to re-writes, solve that? How does this jive with 24's fresh start? Still in America. Still related to a government agency. Still has Chloe and Bill. And now Tony. Wow. This'll feel like a brand new show! SOOOOO different.

I was all excited about 24 trying to put a stake in the ground and "start over," but this news definitely puts them back 17,000 steps.

So let's recap when we last saw Tony. He was dead inside of CTU.

How will this be explained!?! More moles? Tony was taken to be buried but came back to life? Even if he didn't die, NO ONE told Jack? And if they DID know, why wasn't he brought in when Graem and Daddy Bauer were running amuck in season six -- didn't Tony and Michelle's company have something to do with them!?!

Bullshit. I'll say it again. Bullshit.

Way to go Fox. Way to go 24. You're making a mockery out of yourselves.

Feel free to chime in with your thoughts.

Random Notes from 24-land

While catching up on some blogs, I thought I would post some of the random 24-related news from the heres and theres.

Jon Cassar has a "blog"
Yes, it's true. One of 24's Executive Producers, and lead directors, has his own blog. I see it more as a propaganda piece for 24, since it needs all the good ju-ju that it can get, but still, he spouts some interesting stuff on there from time to time. Aside from the casting news he's listed on there, he also talks about how filming is getting close to wrapping for the season's two-hour premiere on Sunday, January 13 – of course it's supposed to be good and all of the actors are supposed to be awesome (I would've loved to read his blog during last season, just to see how what he says would compare to the drivel they gave us).

What I really loved, however, was this little snippet he has on the site:

It's Emmy day, but alas no 24 nominations on the big night except for Kiefers. It's the first time in 6 years I won't be going to the show. I will however be visiting a couple of after parties. We did win an award last weekend at the creative awards, for sound editing, which kept us from being shut out. The show has won at least one emmy for every year it has aired. And we are still the only Drama for Fox network in their history, that was won emmys for "Best Drama", "Best Actor" and "Best Director". And only one of 3 shows (X-Files and House) that have won for "Best Writing".

So he didn't attend the Emmys, because, to me, it sounds like he KNEW that Kiefer wasn't going to win. And like I mentioned the other day, when you win an Emmy, you gotta hang your hat on something – even if it's the Emmy for best sound editing in a series. Keep your eye on his blog for more news. Too bad there's not an RSS feed. I guess he didn't want to be TOO 21st century.

24 named one of Time's Best 100 TV Shows
This one I was so-so on, but when Time even rips season six while saying what a great concept 24 is, you gotta respect that. Check out the beautiful first line:

I was hesitant to include this show after its sixth—and admittedly terrible—season.

Major cast additions/announcements today
The ladies over at 24fan are reporting that Fox will make some major cast additions (and returns) today. As you can see, some are already speculating that Tony Almeida (Carlos Bernard) will be coming back to the show. As you can see on IMDB, on Carlos' profile AND on the Season 7 page, this hasn't been confirmed yet.

If he does come back, however, 24 will have definitely gone off the deep end in trying to return to power. I say leave Tony off and figure out a way to bring back the good President Palmer. I wouldn't even care how they explained that one.

Monday, September 17, 2007

24 Season 6 Wins An Emmy, Just One

It's official – season six sucked. Weird. Who knew?

As I posted a while back about the six Emmy nominations that the show somehow garnered, I made some predictions about what they would win for. Well, I was one for two. Fox can be proud of being this year's winner for Outstanding Sound Editing For A Series.

What an honor. It may have sucked, but at least it sounded good while doing it.

Oh boy, what will season seven bring us?

Monday, August 27, 2007

Jack Bauer for President and Stephen King

In easily the most retarded 24-related news I've ever read, it looks as if some think that having Jack Bauer as Commander in Chief would be the best thing since sliced bread up terrorists. Is it feasible? Sure, Arnold was elected as California governer. But what would that really mean for our country? Let's take a look at Jack's credentials...

  • American citizen, born and raised
  • Served as government agent for several agencies – US Army Delta Force, LAPD SWAT, and finally the Counter Terrorist Unit (CTU) Los Angeles (which is fake)
  • Thwarted at least five terrorist attacks on US soil and one Presidential assassination attempt
  • Widowed, but can't keep a stable relationship longer than a year
  • One daughter, estranged
  • Father conspired AGAINST America
  • Brother conspired AGAINST America
  • Faked his own death to help America
  • Killed Chinese ambassador and countless terrorists
  • Spent 18 months in Chinese prison to help America avoid war
  • Constantly insists doing things his way because “it's the only way”
  • Can navigate through LA in 15 minutes flat
  • Has a man-bag
  • Has died twice and come back to life
  • Contemplated suicide, but DIDN'T pull trigger
  • World's best marksman with handheld
  • Favorite catch-phrase is “damnit”
  • Can bite people to death (probably because he was once a vampire)

Know what? Maybe he would be a good candidate. He's got my vote.


In other news, loyal reader Ivan has pointed out the following quip from Stephen King:

Even when the stuff's bad, you keep buying, hoping this time you'll get some of the primo stuff that hooked you. Remember the spectacular second season of 24, when President Palmer (the believable President Palmer) and Jack Bauer (the believable Jack Bauer) were trying to keep the believable terrorists from blowing up L.A.? I got that season on DVD and sat there in front of my TV hour after hour, slamming in new discs and hoping that Jack would whack the abusive father who was terrorizing Kim. Last season's 24 was only a pale imitation, but I'll be back next year, hoping for a return to the good stuff: more thrills, less filler.

Yes, this was the SAME Stephen King that said the first four episodes of season six were “so good it's scary.” Think he's ready to take that all back, now?

Thursday, August 23, 2007

24 Season 7: More News

Loyal reader Jonk has pointed me in the direction of the latest news haul for season 7. It comes from the Chicago Tribune and it does have it's fair share of spoilers... so BEWARE!!! I'm going to pull some quotes from the article and talk about them below.

And Fox has confirmed that "Entourage's" Rhys Coiro, who plays nutty director Billy Walsh on the Hollywood dramedy, has been cast on "24." Garofalo told Jam Showbiz that he'll play another FBI staffer who works with Gold.

So Entourage's Billy Walsh, who works with Ari Gold will be an FBI staffer who works with Janis Gold (Garofalo). If only we knew the name of Ari's wife... please say it's Janis! Or Janice. Or something similar. In any case, that's another pseudo-comedic actor who's joined the ranks.

At Comic-Con in July, the show’s producers also floated the idea of bringing back Tony Almeida (Carlos Bernard), but that concept is still in the rumor stage.

Genius idea... not. But I bet these guys are creaming in their jeans.

Production was supposed to start in late July, but the writing staff decided to toss the story they had originally planned to tell, which would have taken Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) to Africa and New York.

Good thing, as traveling from NY to Africa would've put Jack on a plane for about half the season. Smart move!

There’s been a slight tweak there, executive producer David Fury noted. Now the plan is to bring Jack before a federal grand jury (instead of a Congressional Committee). “The change was due to the time of day the hearing would take place, and other story concerns. But the purpose is the same,” Fury said.

That's quite the difference! Good call!

Within the universe of the show, “CTU has been dismantled by a corrupt bureaucracy,” Fury said. “Instead, we'll be focusing on FBI headquarters in Washington.”

It's probably best, seeing that CTU would allow the terrorists to go through with 90% of their plans before Jack stopped them. But I'm not sure that the FBI isn't much worse. Oh the webs that 24 spins.

Executive producer Michael Loceff told a Seattle Fox affiliate that next year’s story lines will be “smaller” and more “personal.”

Really? I sure do hope they're being honest here. What a novel idea.

Garafalo’s casting may bring about some lively debates behind the scenes; the actress and comic has been a commentator for the liberal Air America radio network, while “24” co-creator Joel Surnow called himself a “right-wing nut job” in a February New Yorker article about the show.

“But Joel will tell you this – the politics on the show are very varied,” executive producer Evan Katz said in an interview at Comic-Con. “He’s really at one end of the spectrum, and most of us are not. Not at all.”

“But I also feel that the storytelling is pretty apolitical,” Katz added. “You assume [former president] David Palmer was a Democrat and [former president] Charles Logan was a Republican, but there’s no reason to assume that. We purposely stay away from [depicting] any real domestic issues, partly because it’s distracting from the stories we’re trying to tell. We’re not ‘The West Wing.’ And also, we don’t want to alienate 50 percent of the audience.”

Right! You've never been able to tell what party everyone was a part of... orrrr... let's rewind to season one and see what Wikipedia says about David Palmer. Then you have the fact that Sherry Palmer also mentions, paraphrased, "You are the Democratic nominee for President". And except for the fact that Palmer (democrat) ran against Keeler (republican) in the general election, and then Logan replaced the incapacitated Keeler. But yeah, they're not party-aligned.

As for the idea that the show has, at times, legitimized torture as a method of gaining information, Katz said it will always be part of Jack’s “arsenal,” but he also said the writers are “a little sick of it.”

“I think we intend to have him torture people less, simply because we as writers have done it a lot and we always want to do something different,” Katz said.

The writers are getting sick of it? You always want to do something different? YOU'RE THE WRITING STAFF AND THE EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS!!! No one is making you write torturing into the script.

“The critics kind of savaged us a little bit last year, I thought mostly unfairly, so it was nice to see that the fans, as I kind of suspected, stick with the show even if they’re momentarily disappointed about one thing or another,” Katz said.

Unfairly? You "won" Emmys for acting, directing and drama... and you're talking about unfairness? Sheesh.

Fury said in a July interview that it’s not really possible to plan an entire “24” season out in advance. And it does seem like a good idea to keep things flexible: for example, part of the decision to focus much of Season 5’s stellar storytelling on Martha and Charles Logan (who were played by Gregory Itzin and Jean Smart) came as a result of the writers and producers seeing what great work the actors were doing.

“It’s very difficult to map things out, and when you try to do that, everything starts to feel stale,” Fury said. “By nature of what the show is, we almost have to let it be very fluid.”

Ladies and gentlemen... THAT is the exact reason 24 has sucked the past few seasons. How can a show be difficult to map out? Oh, well maybe when your story line gets scrapped twice before production starts... that may make it tough.

Consider yourself informed.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

24 Season 7: Production Delays (Again) and Janeane Garofalo

Yes, for those of you who don't know, Season 7 is progressing very nicely. So nicely, in fact, that the writers and producers can't seem to agree on what direction the show will go next year. And now, for the SECOND TIME, the production start date for 24 has been pushed back.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, shooting on the new "24" season was expected to begin on Aug. 27, but is being moved to Sept. 10 as writers scramble to complete a certain number of scripts.


By this time last year, "24" was announcing guest stars at a rate of two or three a week, but the only new cast member announced so far has been Cherry Jones, playing the president of the United States.

Speaking of cast member announcements, let's, uh, applaud the latest??? (Again from The Hollywood Reporter)

Actress-comedian Janeane Garofalo, an outspoken liberal, is set to co-star on the conservative-leaning real-time drama, whose co-creator/executive producer Joel Surnow jokingly describes himself as a "right-wing nut job."

What? A comedian on the show? A super liberal one at that? Does that mean she'll make fun of everyone for driving around in giant SUVs? Will she deter any company or government agency from using torture? Or will she just become another big-name attached to the show to get people to watch... maybe they want more female liberals this time???

I will say that she did a fantastic job on The West Wing... but that was a REAL Emmy-winning show for writing, direction and acting. I don't see her success with that show translating to awesomeness here, though.

Nothing like grasping at straws, eh FOX?

Thursday, July 19, 2007

24 Season 6 Nominated for (only) 6 Emmys

Oh my, it looks like it's the beginning of the end. With critics calling this 24's lousiest season ever, it was only a matter of time that the award nominations started to dry up, too. What's worse for those in 24-ville... it just racked up its lowest amount of Emmy nominations ever – a whopping six.

24 Season 6 Emmy Nominations:

  1. Outstanding Guest Actress In A Drama Series (Jean Smart) *
  2. Outstanding Lead Actor In A Drama Series (Kiefer Sutherland)
  3. Outstanding Music Composition For A Series (Original Dramatic Score)
  4. Outstanding Sound Editing For A Series (Episode 10:00 PM - 11:00 PM) *
  5. Outstanding Sound Mixing For A Comedy Or Drama Series (one-hour) (Episode 10:00 PM - 11:00 PM)
  6. Outstanding Stunt Coordination (Episode 2:00 PM - 3:00 PM)

That's it gang. No more directing nominations. No more writing nominations. No more casting nominations. There's even less technical nominations than usual. Is it any wonder why season 7 has already been scrapped and is starting over?

I’ve marked my predictions for 24’s winners with asteriks above. Kiefer won't win back-to-back Emmys this time, even though he did bite someone to death (that's acting). Jean Smart, who many say got snubbed last year, will win with her 20 minute guest appearance. There's not much else to talk about here since all 24 will get acclaimed for is having good stunt work and sound editing. But hey, you gotta hang your hat on something, right?

We’ll see how it does. Below are 24’s past nominations and wins.

Season 1: 2002 Emmys

  • Nominated: Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Art Direction for a Single Camera Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Single Camera Sound Mixing for a Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Single Camera Picture Editing for a Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Music Composition for a Series (Dramatic Underscore)
  • Nominated: Outstanding Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Casting for a Drama Series

Season 2: 2003 Emmys

  • Nominated: Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Single Camera Sound Mixing for a Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Single Camera Picture Editing for a Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Sound Editing for a Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Music Composition for a Series (Dramatic Underscore)
  • Nominated: Outstanding Stunt Coordination
  • Nominated: Outstanding Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Casting for a Drama Series

Season 3: 2004 Emmys

  • Nominated: Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Single Camera Sound Mixing for a Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Single Camera Picture Editing for a Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Sound Editing for a Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Music Composition for a Series (Dramatic Underscore)
  • Winner: Outstanding Stunt Coordination
  • Nominated: Outstanding Drama Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Casting for a Drama Series

Season 4: 2005 Emmys

  • Nominated: Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Cinematography for a Single-Camera Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Single Camera Sound Mixing for a Series
  • Nominated (three times): Outstanding Single Camera Picture Editing for a Series
  • Winner: Outstanding Sound Editing for a Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Music Composition for a Series (Dramatic Underscore)
  • Winner: Outstanding Stunt Coordination
  • Nominated: Outstanding Drama Series
  • Nominated: Outstanding Casting for a Drama Series

Season 5: 2006 Emmys

  1. Nominated: Outstanding Cinematography For A Single-Camera Series
  2. Winner: Outstanding Directing For A Drama Series
  3. Winner: Outstanding Single-Camera Picture Editing For A Drama Series
  4. Nominated: Outstanding Single-Camera Picture Editing For A Drama Series (nominated twice)
  5. Winner: Outstanding Music Composition For A Series (Dramatic Underscore)
  6. Winner: Outstanding Lead Actor In A Drama Series (Kiefer Sutherland)
  7. Nominated: Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Drama Series (Gregory Itzin)
  8. Nominated: Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Drama Series (Jean Smart)
  9. Winner: Outstanding Drama Series
  10. Nominated: Outstanding Sound Editing For A Series
  11. Nominated: Outstanding Single-Camera Sound Mixing For A Series
  12. Nominated: Outstanding Stunt Coordination

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

24 Season 7: Starting Over!?! Season 6 Sucked!?! Do Tell!

Hmmm. So I guess the first episode script I read a few weeks ago may now be complete trash. A loyal reader/commentor has pointed me in the direction of the latest and greatest news from the 24 camp. Here's a few snippets from the article:

Execs at the Fox hit have scrapped virtually their entire story line for the season, delaying the start of production by roughly three weeks. According to sources, the 11th-hour time-out was called after the network put the kibosh on a costly plan to shoot a number of episodes in Africa.

Wow! Scrapped the entire story line? That's pretty crazy to do, especially since they were so close to principle photography for next season. It also sounds like they were just going to try to find a suitable area around LA to fake the Africa scenes... heh, okay.

Let's see, what else. Oh, this is what Mary Lynn Rajskub had to say about the situation:

"I don't know what's going on over there, but they're going crazy," says the scene-stealer, who learned only last week that Chloe would be returning. "We usually start [back up] at the end of July, and I don't think we're starting until a couple of weeks into August now. It's kind of exciting, because I think [the postponement] means that they're really having to dig in there and come up with new stuff."

So Mary Lynn only found out last week that she was returning? What would be the point of the whole baby story line from last year if she didn't return? And please, you think this is exciting to have an ENTIRE SEASON RE-WRITE right before you start filming? If that statement doesn't have your publicist's finger prints written all over it, I don't know what does.

As the article mentions, and what I see to be icing on the cake, is that this news oddly came out the SAME DAY as this news:

The show's creative team was no doubt already feeling the pressure: Day 6 was considered to be about as explosive as a wet firecracker, so for Season 7 they really needed a plot that was incendiary. In fact, news of the setback comes on the same day the semiannual Television Week critics' poll (in which yours truly participated) named 24 the second-worst show on TV, behind ABC's best-not-traveled October Road.

What have I been saying all along!?! This show took a MAJOR dive TWO seasons ago... and critics are just now catching up. I'm sorry, shows don't go from Emmy-winning to second worst on TV in 6 months. That's residual. It's ingrained. It's also hilarious that they decide to scrap it the same day they find out their show blows.

News about season 7's new turn can only come fast enough. I guess they have three weeks to come up with something. Maybe they're awaiting next week's Emmy-nominations to find out if their show truly sucked. Crystal ball time – they'll get a few nominations, for technical stuff. Zero in the acting, or genre, categories.

If only there were "Worst of" awards...

Saturday, June 30, 2007

24 Season 7: The First Episode Script Synopsis

WARNING: The following post may, and probably will, contain spoilers.

Things are popping up in the 24 news world. Loyal reader Jonk has pointed me to a television forum that has a synopsis of the first episode for season seven (look for Post #4334). Apparently news from previous seasons have ended up on the forum and 90% of the time, that news pans out to be true.

Now I've just read the synopsis, and here's what I think (WARNING: Even though this is rumored material, I wouldn't read past here unless you're okay knowing about next season):

The show's producers knew that they had to change 24 up. In fact, please recall that they were going to "reinvent" the show. How'd they do it? Here's a synopsis of the synopsis:

  • The location is in Washington D.C., not L.A.
    That means that instead of smog in the backgrounds of shots, we'll have the Capitol building (which is mentioned). Jack is still driving around, even though DC has a pretty good mass transit system, but this time the size of the city won't be overly daunting for time travel. This also puts us REALLY close to the White House, which is always a good thing in the 24 world.
  • Jack no longer works for CTU
    I guess he was finally done with death and working with the government. So now, he works for a defense contractor – who may, or may not, be selling arms to Muslims and/or rogue African nations. What a stretch this will be from the job he had with Heller in season five.
  • Jack's boss and another defense contractor hate each other
    There's your first sign of a bad rub. Jack's boss thinks this other dude is setting him up and sends Jack to figure out what's going on... because Jack's new job is as an Investigator? Unfortunately, even his own boss wants him dead and sends people to kill Jack. So there's a shoot-out, in the streets of DC. Good thing Jack still carries a weapon around... in DC... when he's probably constantly talking to lobbyists and senators.
  • Jack's got a new chicky
    They're totally doing it in the first episode (at least its not 60 year olds), too. Then he leaves and she pulls the ole "I'm sleeping with you only to get information for my employer," routine. But Jack was playing the, "I know exactly what you're doing, so I'm giving you fake information but making you think that I'm giving you real information... ha ha ha, you dumb bitch... you're a bad lay, anyway," routine. Backstabbing by a lover, this is totally a new twist in 24 (see Nina in season one, see Invasion Chick/Hornball in season six).
  • Chloe and Morris aren't at CTU anymore
    They're now at Division. With child (Gwenyth). I don't really understand this move. Why do you promote two employees who were constant sources of mess ups at CTU? We all know the place was understaffed, so when enemies hacked into the CTU computers, there's only a handful of people to blame. Chances are, the whiney chick who hates Division and the alcoholic will be blamed first. Oh, but get this, in the first episode, Division gets hacked! That's quite the track record they bring with them to DC. And the only reason the writers gave the baby a name is because there will be some story line with her involved.
  • The rumors of a female president are true
    It's only fair. The show has had both a white and black male president. It's time for some estrogen in the White House. Let's also make her despise her husband and make that into a major story line. We've never seen the President and their First Mate ever have problems (see David Palmer vs. Sherry, see Grizzly Logan vs. psycho).
  • Old faces return
    It's been said that Bill and Karen will return in episode two.

Talk about reinventing 24. Reading the synopsis, I almost had no clue as to what the show was. It sounded SO DIFFERENT than previous years. Yes, that's sarcasm and I'm laying it on pretty thick.

Honestly, this sounds like the same song in a different pitch. The writers can't seem to ween themselves away from the Middle East, the White House, backstabbing plots, computer hacking troubles, shoot-outs in the middle of the street with non-authoritative figures, or anything else we've seen in other seasons of 24. Do the writers think that merely changing the city and making the president a woman reinvents the show? Wow. Hardly in my book.

I'll try to withhold judgement until I actually see the first episode in January. But if this pans out to be true, then I'm already down on the season and what FOX has done to make the show better. Aka, nothing.

Friday, June 22, 2007

24 Season 7 News: The Show Needs a Woman's Touch?

The latest news about 24's seventh season comes from TV Guide (hat tip, Jonk):

Word on the street is that the Commander in Chief on next season's revamped 24 will likely be a (drumroll, please) woman. Casting could begin any day now on the sure-to-be-plum part. A show rep, however, cautions, "Nothing about next season has been absolutely decided as of yet."

Good lord. THIS is how we revamp for next season? By stealing a plot twist from Prison Break adding a female president? If you continue on reading the full article, it also mentions that there may be a female FBI agent in the mix AND no CTU. Additionally, new cities (New York, Washington D.C. and London) are being scouted. And lastly, only Jack and Chloe are set to return.

What a shake-up. Talk about reinventing the show.

Can't we just get rid of the whole White House story line? It's old and tired. Plus, as Jonk points out, this would be the 9th president the show has seen (some in theory).

I thought we were going in a totally different direction. But I guess we HAVE to keep Chloe around since she's pregnant with Morris', or could it be Milo's, baby... and we couldn't pass up another opportunity to see Chloe be awkward with a baby (see season three). It's gold, I guess.

They're going to add females to the mix. So what? Same song, different tune. I'm bored already.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

24 Season 6 Earns ZERO Nominations by the Television Critics Association

Biggest. Shocker. Ever.

Last year, Season Five was nominated three times by the Television Critics Association, but came up empty handed. It was a strange twist indeed, but I think it spoke volumes. The same critics that hailed Season Five as the best ever, couldn't vote for them to win awards. I just don't know how that loss translates into Emmy wins -- I still say it was a make-up award from seasons One through Three.

Well, this year, in what was easily the crappiest season ever, 24 couldn't even muster up a single nod from the TCA.

Boo hoo. Good thing they're "reinventing" the show.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

24 Season 7 Teaser

WARNING: The following post could contain spoilers. Proceed at your own risk.

Oh boy! We're not even a full 24 hours past the season six finale and we're already being teased about season seven! Joyous occasion! If any of you missed last nights 14 second snippet, here it is.

Yes, they DID say that next season will be the "best season yet." That's good, because I totally trust FOX and their marketing ploys now. What's disconcerting is that while the Executive Producer is talking about re-inventing the show, FOX runs a promo that showcases torture, gun fire, sex and explosions. Talk about being on the same page creatively, eh?

So what exactly are we looking forward to next season? How about we pull up some of the things that WEREN'T answered or left conveniently open-ended this year.

  • What Important Thing Was Jack Traded For?
  • Brother Palmer's (Wayne) Injury
  • The Nadia/Silver Spoon (Doyle) Love Angle
  • The Chloe/Morris Love Angle
  • The Jack/Marilyn Love Angle
  • Audrey Becoming Sane
  • What Happened in Denver?
  • What Happened to Milo's Bro?
  • What Happened to That Guy Who Checked in on Nadia?
  • Daddy Bauer, Dead or Alive?
  • President Grizzly Logan, Dead or Alive?
  • Component, Dead or Alive?
  • Josh Bauer, Kim's Brother or Cousin?
  • Jack Bauer, Suicidal or Sane?

As you can see, the writers left themselves plenty to choose from for next season. Though, I really think that the show needs to break ground again and go in a different direction.

Monday, May 21, 2007

24 Season 6: Episode 23 Recap
(Hours 4:00 a.m. - 6:00 a.m.)
The Season Finale
The 100th Post

WARNING: The following post may, and probably will, contain spoilers.

Alas we have come to the end of season six. This was supposed to be the best season ever, their follow-up to their "Emmy-winning" season five. So how do they follow that up? They create a season that featured more characters and plot twists than ever before. They included several recycled plot lines. They wrote crappy dialogue and dumbed everything down for their aging viewer base. Wow, what a follow up. Thank goodness we only had to spend 19 weeks with them this year, too bad the last episode was two hours long.

The Beginning of the End
The helicopter with Silver Spoon and Josh races along the coast and apparently is pretty sound-proof inside... that allows Silver Spoon to explain to Josh what's going on (which really serves as a chance to let the audience know what's going on). Silver Spoon needs to inject Josh with a tracking isotope for when he's taken -- let's hope he's not like Gredenko and cuts his arm off, too.

Jack is placed in temporary custody to protect CTU's operation. Say, how many times this year has Jack been placed in custody? Not to be outdone, Jack calls Chloe who immediately says "Nadia said you were in custody." Didn't that JUST happen? How would she know? Never mind that, Jack wants to know why they're trading Josh over to Daddy Bauer -- I don't ever recall hearing that being told to Jack, but he's all-knowing. Even though Silver Spoon has a plan, Jack doesn't trust it and wants to talk to Karen.

At the White House, Evil Veep, Fish and Karen are on the phone with the Russian President. Those three are the only three people that matter in DC -- decisions and conversations about war usually only involve three people. Evil Veep explains the dilly about the sub-circuit board/circuit board/component. Just then, Karen's 1980s cell phone rings and SHE LEAVES THE CONFERENCE CALL WITH THE RUSSIAN PRESIDENT. Jack talks to Karen and tells them that they're crazy for making a deal with his father. You see, his dad is "smart enough to manipulate this exchange." Please Jack, explain this to us dumb audience members, we don't understand the situation fully. Karen tells Jack that she agrees with him and that he needs to take care of it on his end. If only! He's under arrest... AGAIN! Just then the doors open and Jack has to get off the phone... man, it sure took a long time for those CTU agents to get in the car to take Jack back to CTU.

Karen updates Fish about her phone call with Jack... to which Fish asks, "I thought he was under arrest." Yes Fish, we're right there with you, Jack probably shouldn't still have a phone on him. She tells Fish that Jack thinks Daddy Bauer will try to get the boy AND the sub-circuit board/circuit board/component. Fish is perplexed, but Karen trusts Jack's instincts because, "he's been more right today than we have." Fish doesn't have the right relationship with Evil Veep to suggest an alternative plan -- but he'll definitely commit treason by looking the other way while Karen does! THAT'S why there should always be just three people running the White House -- less loose ends to tie up.

Karen calls Bill (aww, they have matching phones), who's at home with the FBI while they take all of his stuff... at 4:00 am. Karen spills her guts to Bill, who really shouldn't be hearing any of this information since he was FIRED. But Karen needs his help and doesn't care that the FBI is at his house and not helping CTU find the missing sub-circuit board/circuit board/component. Karen says that Nadia is a dead-end and asks Bill to do whatever it takes to stop the exchange.

Silver Spoon and Josh land on the beach, Nadia confirms that fact with the up-and-running-again-real-time satellites. They check on the tracking device inside of Josh, and, yup, it's working, too... since they made a big deal out of it, that must mean the signal will get scrambled or lost at some point. Also, it's important to note that, according to episode 16, the tracking isotope inside of Josh is only traceable up to 15 miles -- I'm willing to bet that CTU is much further away than 15 miles... don't you?

Silver Spoon, the only CTU agent at the exchange point gets a scrambled phone call -- don't worry, Morris explains to Nadia (and us stupid audience members) that they'll still be able to listen in on the call... just not trace it... or pinpoint the origin. Silver Spoon answers the phone and Daddy Bauer tells CTU to turn off their satellite feed (they must be stealing it illegally), apparently he has an "uplink" into their system. Morris confirms it but doesn't know how it's possible -- so he can program a trigger to work for a nuke, but can't figure out how this uplink is working? No worries, though, because Josh's tracker is on an internal network. WAIT... the satellite feed, something that could give away precious internal information is on an external network!?! Really!?!

Anyway, Morris shuts down the satellite and Silver Spoon sends the chopper back to CTU. Since their last conversation went so well and provided no real plot development, Daddy Bauer wants to talk to Josh again. Daddy Bauer tries to convince Josh that China will be cool. Silver Spoon and Josh wait for Daddy Bauer's goons to come get Josh. While they wait, Silver Spoon wants to know how he'll confirm that the sub-circuit board/circuit board/component is real... this is easy, the sub-circuit board/circuit board/component has an R72 Socket that he can plug his PDA into. Yes, the old Russian sub-circuit board/circuit board/component, that was inside of suitcase nukes from the 1980s and contains essential bits of information about Russia's security, has a port that a PDA can plug into.

Silver Spoon tells Nadia that he's going to try and grab the kid back if he has an opportunity, to which Nadia gets pissed and says no, apparently they've broken the rules too much today. Karen calls Nadia to check in on the status of the exchange. Nadia tells Karen that Jack is being transferred to detention at District... for the first time ever, someone won't be held at CTU... that'll make it so much easier for Jack to escape. Nadia gets called to the lounge because of Marilyn Bauer -- she wants to see her son and not be treated like a prisoner. She threatens to sue Nadia and CTU and then wrestles with the security guards. Two more security guards are sent in to take Marilyn into holding... yes, holding. Attention to all you mothers out there missing your children on the day of a nuclear attack on US soil -- don't act all hysterical!

As Jack is being taken to District, the vehicle he's in is forced off the road. As Agent #1 (Turner) gets out to check on the situation, Agent #2 remembers why he failed Arresting Class in Police School as the non-handcuffed Jack steals his gun. The VERY un-American Bill gets out of his Toyota truck and talks Turner down from shooting him... then Jack knocks both agents out and he leaves with Bill.

Back at CTU, Milo's Bro (Stuart) shows up and Chloe hugs him. He's there to sign a release for Milo's body and Chloe goes to help him.

At the White House, Karen opens her computer up and notices that she no longer has access. She calls Bill to tell him thanks, that she's sorry and loves him. Two seconds later, she gets arrested.

Nadia talks to Milo's Bro inside the CTU locker room? He asks how Milo died and she tells him the gallant story. He tells Nadia that Milo was really in love with her and had mentioned her before... wasn't their love a new thing on the show... I mean, wasn't he all involved with Chloe and Morris at one point this season? Anyway, after a phone call with Chloe about the breaking news regarding Jack's escape (that we knew about three minutes earlier, so who took Karen's access away since CTU just found out?), Nadia turns to find that Milo's Bro is gone to NEVER reappear. Ever. Pointless.

Josh pleads with Silver Spoon to not go through with this and Silver Spoon pulls the ole, "you gotta do this for your country" bit. And then, for good measure, the writers give him the Jack line of giving Josh "his word that he'll get him back." Nadia calls and tells Silver Spoon that Jack's escaped and on his way... to which Silver Spoon uses another Jack response, "damn it."

Karen's being held in some weird brick-walled detention cell inside the White House... they have detention cells in the White House? Evil Veep comes and to berate Karen for her actions. She protects Fish. Evil Veep says that if Jack prevents this exchange and the Russians attack, it's all her fault -- see, one of three people get pinned. Easy.

Silver Spoon gets a call from Daddy Bauer and is instructed to walk Josh down to the beach. Morris notices that Chloe is pale. A boat pulls up with Daddy Bauer's goons. Silver Spoon and Goon A exchange the sub-circuit board/circuit board/component at gunpoint. As Silver Spoon hooks his PDA into the sub-circuit board/circuit board/component, it explodes! Goon A grabs Josh just as Jack and Bill show up. Jack doesn't have a clear shot and the goons drive away. Daddy Bauer doesn't trust CTU so he has the goons scan Josh with a green LED light. Sure enough, they find the tracking isotope and then use a red laser pointer to disable it.

Jack calls Blondie (Reynolds) at CTU and asks for Nadia. He explains what happened and says that Josh is with Daddy Bauer's goons on a boat. He needs satellite coverage. Unfortunately, satellites are like stadium florescent lights -- they turn off in two seconds, but take more than five minutes to get back up and running. Nadia, fresh off of losing Milo, is concerned with Doyle's injuries. Jack tells her to hurry and fights off the urge to tell her he was right.

Evil Veep already knows the bad news about the exchange and is upset that Karen, and ulitmately Jack, was right. He gives Fish a lesson in power. Fish then tells Evil Veep that he should dismiss the charges levied against Karen... but Evil Veep just wants answers... and some sex.

Jack calls Nadia and tells her that Silver Spoon is okay but might be blind in both eyes. Nadia is sad that her rockin' body may not be fully appreciated by Silver Spoon and tells Jack that she was wrong not to listen to him... is this REALLY the morale we want to be telling in a story -- that one man is ALWAYS right? Jack figures out that Daddy Bauer is on an off-shore oil rig... CTU apparently sucks at their job since they didn't think of that knowing full well who Daddy Bauer is and what he did for a living.

Cut to the oil rig... Daddy Bauer is STILL working with incompetent Chang! They exchange horrible dialogue and then Daddy Bauer looks out to the ocean and feels Jack through the Force. Jack knows that there is still good in him.

Chloe's vision starts to get blurry. She gets up to talk to Morris and collapses. Morris yells for someone to help him, but no one wants to since he got drilled in the arm after helping arm the nuke.

Daddy Bauer's goons finally show up to the oil rig and Josh is reunited with his grandfather. Chang lets Daddy Bauer know that the submarine is on schedule and should be there in 30 minutes.

Chloe is resting in the CTU medical wing, she collapsed because she's exhausted and dehydrated -- uh, football players die from the exact same thing and I think Chloe should sue CTU for poor working conditions. She tells Morris to go back onto the floor and sheds a tear as he leaves... why does love make us do such silly things. Morris hops on Nadia's machine and does the ol' tried and true thermal scan on the oil rig. Sure enough, he finds the right rig in 10 seconds.

Fish tells Evil Veep that Daddy Bauer and Josh have been located on the rig. CTU is on their way, but one of Evil Veep's men suggests that an air attack is the best way to ensure not messing up. Fish agrees but isn't sure an aerial attack is worth the life of an innocent 16 year-old. Wait... WHAT!?! Let's see... waaaaaaaaaaar, or Josh. Waaaaaaaaaar, orrrrrrrrrrr Josh. Hmmm. Evil Veep concurs and sends the air strike.

Josh talks to Nadia and she tells him that Evil Veep ordered an air strike and that he and Bill are to come back to CTU for an immediate de-brief -- or to be arrested again since they've both committed treason. Bill tells Jack to not do something stupid. Jack says the only reason he's going to do said stupid thing is NOT because Josh is his nephew, but because taking the life of an innocent 16 year-old is not acceptable -- to stop a war Jack, I'd say... yeeeeeeeah, it is. But hey, Jack is ALWAYS right.

In the world of 24, where timing is everything, it took 20 minutes for the boat to go six miles on the ocean. It'll take the air strike team more than 27 minutes to get in range. But the helicopter has been flying for almost five, and it's still not at the oil rig? That's a slow chopper. Evil Veep talks to the Russian President and asks him to hold off on his attack based on some new evidence. Luckily, this time, the Russian President believes him since he knows that a Chinese sub is in their area... WAIT UP!!! HOW DID A CHINESE SUB GET THAT CLOSE TO THE U.S. WITHOUT US KNOWING!?!

Chang tells Daddy Bauer that a helicopter is approaching. He gives Daddy Bauer the component and goes to help attack the chopper. Bill lands the chopper as Jack snipes several people with an assault rifle. Impressive. Jack shoots everyone and doesn't believe Chang's "you're too late," line and goes searching for Josh. Daddy Bauer and Josh are in the basement of the rig and Daddy Bauer tries to give a lesson in the Force to Josh. Suddenly the air strike team is near and ready to blow the place up. Josh whacks Daddy Bauer in the head with a wrench. Josh takes the gun and shoots Daddy Bauer just as Jack finds them. Jack talks Josh down and tells him to get to the top of the rig.

Jack faces off with Daddy Bauer and jack tells him that by dying, he gets off easy.

You Said You Wanted a Resolution?

  • Bill takes off and Jack jumps on just as the rig is blown to pieces. Success!
  • As they're making it to the shore, Jack falls off of the chopper ladder. He washes up on to the beach and just as it appears that Bill will pick him up, Jack takes off because, "he's not ready to go back, yet."
  • Evil Veep wants sleep, but Fish wants Karen to be taken off the hook and for her and Bill to be able to resign. Evil Veep agrees and Fish gives him the evidence he held over him.
  • Morris goes to visit Chloe, who despite being exhausted and dehydrated, isn't hooked up to an IV or sleeping. Chloe's condition is serious and Morris wants to get back together with her. She's preggers. And yet, nobody cares.
  • Karen is released by Fish.
  • Josh and Bill return to CTU with Chang in custody.
  • Josh is reunited with Marilyn.
  • Nadia speaks with Bill and he tells her that Jack is gone.

Heller is talking on the phone at his house and Jack shows up asking for Audrey. He talks about Heller's ludicrous remark that everything Jack touches is cursed. He yells at Heller for not trying hard enough to get him out of China. Jack simply wants his life back... and he wants Audrey, too. Then Heller brings up Teri... diss! Heller takes Jack to see Audrey. Jack holds her hand but she doesn't respond because she's sleeping and is psycho. Jack decides that he has to leave her alone and go away on his own.

Jack leaves Heller's place and contemplates jumping off the deck into the ocean. And that's how it ends. Wait... that's how it ends!?!

THAT was the twist ending? THAT is how the writers are starting off the reinvented, re-imagined 24!?! You've got to be kidding me. People, they're grasping at straws! They were so ready for this lost season to end that they tried everything they could to get you to watch. Even the small promo for season seven promised it would be the best season ever... I'll tell you right now, if they just replayed season one next year, I would agree with that claim.

This season was awful. Abysmal. Not creative in the least bit. Nor exciting. I ask someone to go back and count how many times the plot shifted and how many stories they tried to tell. Young writers, take note... this is NOT how to write engaging television.

Good riddance season six.

Friday, May 18, 2007

Predict the Final Two Hours of 24 Season Six

TWO MORE HOURS!!! Yes, that's right. We've hung in there all season long and have been poking holes in it the entire time (well, most of us, that is). And we're finally at the apex of it all. What could possibly happen now? The Executive Producer promises something crazy, but I would advise you to remain calm. Nothing they do on Monday night will fix the crap that was this season.

Last week I posted a list of things that they have yet to tie up -- we know how much the writers like to put bows on things. This week, let's really try and figure out what will happen to the main plots still left. I'll start us off:

  • Brother Palmer's injury
    He regains consciousness in time to help talk the Russian President off the ledge.
  • Sister Palmer and her wanna-be terrorist boyfriend
    I think we've seen the last of these two, thank God.
  • Karen and Bill's marriage
    Stronger than ever since Karen will coerce Bill to go help Jack behind someone's back.
  • The Nadia/Silver Spoon love angle (since Milo is dead)
    They'll try to make us think that they're the next Tony/Michelle. We'll all vomit in our mouths.
  • The Chloe/Morris love angle
    This looks like it could be a potential major plot line as Chloe looked hurt in the previews. My guess, she dies.
  • The Jack/Marilyn love angle
    Jack will leave her high and dry, even though Josh is his bastard son.
  • Audrey becoming sane
    Not entirely. She'll snap out of her hysterics to give the US a key piece of information about how the Russians and Chinese are secretly working together to fight the US.
  • Heller giving in to Jack's desire to be with his psycho daughter
    I could really care less.
  • Daddy Bauer's ultra-patriotism
    Turns out he hates America, who knew!?!
  • What the hell ever happened in Denver?
    This could be a bad un-tied loose end. I do, however, think it'll creep back in during the last hour.
  • Poor Man Rob Lowe's testimony
    He's done.
  • Invasion Chick's Hornball boyfriend
    He's done, too.
  • Evil Veep's nasty sexual story line
    Won't check into re-hab, too busy trying to spin more lies to the Russians.
  • Fish's allegiance to who?
    Secretly hopes that Brother Palmer wakes up soon -- can't stand Evil Veep's attempts at seducing the newly appointed interns.
  • Chang and the component
    Game over for Chang. Too bad Jack doesn't get to pull the trigger.
  • CTU being held hostage
    A metal plate will be installed over the sewer hole and things will be called good.
  • The Russians starting WWIII
    It's obvious that something else is going on here aside from going to war over a piece of circuitry. Such an elaborate plot to declare war on the US.
  • What ever happened to Logan?
    No funeral. No news coverage. Nothing.
  • Jack's acid-washed hands
    Becomes depressed that back-up plan as a hand model is over.
  • Jack's propensity to eat flesh rather than real food over the past 21 hours
    Pleads with everyone to start calling him Zombie-Jack, starts a cult in Texas.

What do you think will happen?

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

24 Seasons 7 and 8 Confirmed

As reported by many entertainment web sites, 24 has indeed been green lit for two more seasons, taking them to a total of eight seasons. As reported by

With its sixth season finale approaching next Monday (May 21), "24" now has a seemingly secure spot on FOX's schedule through the 2008-09 season. Not-so-coincidentally, the renewal carries the show through the duration of star Kiefer Sutherland's contract with the show's production company, 20th Century Fox TV.

We had already known about Kiefer's new contract signed back in 2006, but FOX finally made the contract official by ordering seasons seven and eight.

I'm not sure about any of you, or your feelings towards the show, but I don't think this is a good move. As reported in the LA Times, 24's viewership has been steadily declining this season. So the Executive Producer has already promised that they're going to reinvent the show for next year. In my opinion, it's one season too late.

The Emmy-winning season five wasn't good and this season is arguably the worst. A reinvention may be necessary, but with the median age of the show steadily increasing, the writers going to be hard-pressed to reimagine the series in an inventive way. After all, they have to hit their viewership numbers, right?

What does everyone else think about this move?

Monday, May 14, 2007

24 Season 6: Episode 22 Recap
(Hour 3:00 a.m. - 4:00 a.m.)

WARNING: The following post may, and probably will, contain spoilers.

Aw no! Only three hours to go!?! Speaking of three, it's 3:00 a.m. in LA and all those people who were at the bar earlier in the season are now hitting the roads, probably drunk out of their gords since a NUCLEAR BOMB EXPLODED earlier in the day. That is, if they even noticed. What else is going on at 3:00 a.m.?

There's a Hole in the CTU Bucket
After finally coaxing Josh out of the air ducts, The Attack Team (TAT) takes Josh into the sewers (yes, the same one that's 8 feet below CTU's basement and only separated by a thin layer of concrete). Marilyn freaks out, Nadia protests (and gets knocked the hell down) and Jack screams for them to stop. They actually stop, because, who else besides Jack would they listen to? Then, for some reason, TAT Leader explains their escape plan – they're going to move everyone into a secure room in two groups and then they're leaving. Why don't they just kill everyone there? Chang already said to secure the boy by any means... and they've already declared them public enemy number one by blowing up a helicopter... but no, TAT chooses to go the Dr. Evil route by telling everyone their plan of escape.

While en route to the secure room, Jack formulates a plan to escape, because if they get locked in the room, they'll "lose their only chance to get the component." Never mind that Silver Spoon and his team are out there, Jack's just concerned because there's less than three hours left in this season, and rightfully so.

Jack makes his move and engages two TAT members. Nadia takes on a third one and Morris (who knew NOTHING about this plan) puts the sleeper hold on another guy. Jack chokes TAT Leader to death and then breaks his neck for good measure. Morris, who's showing no signs of a previously DRILLED SHOULDER, takes care of his guy. Then, Silver Spoon (who's not in his attack gear anymore) finally shows up -- he must've gotten caught up in that 3:00 a.m. bar traffic.

With the situation handled, Jack says that all he needs is a tactical set up and comm, and he's ready to go. Oh, but wait, Jack's still under arrest! He pleads with Nadia because he knows the schematics of the building better than anyone (since he's spent so much time down there -- Teri's death, killing Nina, trying to un-psycho Audrey, etc.) and he can find them -- I'm guessing that he knows the sewers, too, since that's where TAT went. Like a true leader of CTU, Nadia breaks protocol and allows Jack to be not-arrested. As she's telling Silver Spoon about Milo, Jack, who just got the tactical set up (aka a flak jacket), interrupts what would've been a lame romantic moment, and he leaves with Silver Spoon.

Jack and Silver Spoon hop into the tunnels -- literally. Which, I'm guessing isn't the smartest way to being a pursuit. They follow for five minutes and still haven't caught up to Josh's captors. Just then, Josh and TAT arrive at the warehouse. Chang calls Daddy Bauer and then gives the phone to Josh. Daddy Bauer tells Josh he wants to protect him from Graem's mistakes and says he's taking Josh to China. Chang and his men pack up to go.

The writers, seeking a new way for Jack to be extremely precise with his shooting, have him shoot the driver of a moving car while climbing through the warehouse floor. Another shootout commences, yawn. Jack pursues Chang and Josh to the roof. Josh kicks Chang in the face -- who cusses ($10 says it's the same phrase he muttered a few episodes ago when finding out that the component was damaged) -- and runs away. Jack makes it up to the roof and corners Chang -- who suddenly teleports away while Josh nearly kills himself.

Chang calls Daddy Bauer and tells him that Josh was lost. Daddy Bauer's upset because Josh was the price for fixing the circuit board! Daddy Bauer calls the deal off and says that the component is no longer the Chineses'. Chang threatens some serious consquences if it's not given back (like 20 months of torture, or blowing up an American Governmental Agency's helicopter, or driving three Hummers around thus hurting the Ozone layer), but Daddy Bauer doesn't flinch -- he's not scared of Chang.

Nadia asks Chloe if Chang and/or the component (which is now being called the circuit board, or, sometimes the sub-circuit board) had been found. Just then, Ben Cramm (Cram-It) shows up to assess the damage done to CTU. He then explains that it's basically Nadia's fault that CTU was broken into and that they lost a few people. Cram-It also explains that he feels dumb for accepting Bill Buchanan's (alert, what happens when a character's full name is used?) suggestion that Nadia should take over. Viewers are supposed to think this is unfair and that no one, not even Bill, could've prevented this break-in... but I suggest you not fall into that trap. Instead, we should ask why the writers continue to have CTU broken into and out of nearly every season? Surely they can come up with something better than that, right?

Morris overheard Nadia's conversation with Cram-It and consoles her that it wasn't her fault. But she totally blames herself for Milo's death. Boo-hoo. Morris gives her a rah-rah speech. And we all roll our eyes.

Jack phones in to CTU and asks to be patched through to Marilyn's cell phone -- which CTU happens to have handy and on file. Silver Spoon tells Jack that he and his men couldn't find the sub-circuit board anywhere and it looks like Chang somehow made it out alive. Jack explains all that he knows to Marilyn. Then Josh gets to talk to his mom, which probably means that Josh is going to get taken from Jack's custody.

Why the White House Shouldn't Lead Undercover Ops
Karen's back and informs Evil Veep about the Russian troop movement. She then says that Fish was supposed to be on the call with her and that she couldn't find him anywhere, so she asks Evil Veep if there's something that she should know about. The quick answer would be, "it's none of your business, or you'd already know." Instead, Evil Veep explains that Fish is in the filed running a classified operation...wait, WHY!?! He's the Chief of Staff! He's supposed to be running the White House while the President runs the country! That's unimportant!

Evil Veep explains that Invasion Chick's Hornball boyfriend was the leak... so Karen, just to assist the audience and clarify what he meant, asks, "so that's how the Russian's knew the Chinese had the component?" I feel dumber every time I watch this show. Evil Veep then explains why Karen wasn't on last week's episode kept in the loop on this -- because he was sleeping with Invasion Chick, too! And that if she doesn't convince Hornball to contact the Russians and say the component has been recovered, his mistake could lead them to war! Morale of the story -- don't have sexual relations with your employees.

Viewers are then treated to hearing Invasion Chick and Hornball having sex. Necessary. Hornball looks like he's in pain, but isn't sweating at all. Their pillow talk is lousy and she decides to finally go and wash up. Hornball hops outta bed and moves toward her purse. Fish gets excited because Hornball is too predictable. Wait... or is he...? Turns out he doesn't fall for the trap and then confronts her about her sex and how lousy it was! He freaks out on her and she breaks a wine bottle over his head. He then slaps her to the ground and then starts choking her. Just then, Fish's task force team breaks in and saves her (thank God, right?).

As the sun starts rising in DC, Fish breaks the situation down for Hornball. Either he helps fool the Russians, or he gets the death penalty.

Fish calls in to Evil Veep and says that the planted information has been sent to the Russians. He also tells him that Invasion Chick was hurt during the operation... Evil Veep gets upset with Fish and says that he should've protected her! Karen ends the phone call and tries to get Evil Veep under control so they can call Russian President Suberov and tell him a lie.

Suberov then calls them out for planting fake evidence!!! Oh man, what a twist! The Russians were watching Hornball's apartment, too, and already knows that they were lying. He then gives Evil Veep two hours (which, for those of you NOT keeping track, will be around the end of the season) to really destroy the component or else! Evil Veep then says the most obvious stupid plot point ever -- they're about to go to war over a piece of circuitry. Yeah, lame.

Fish gets back to the White House and intgerrupts Evil Veep's meeting after he gets a scrambled phone call from Daddy Bauer -- he wants Josh and clear passage to the country of his choice in exchange for the FC sub-circuit board. To prove that he has it, he calls out the serial number -- 3PTL3, which Fish confirms is true. Karen can't believe that Evil Veep is considering brokering a deal with Daddy Bauer. Evil Veep then questions why Suberov is doing this, which is something that NO ONE has thought of until now? Evil Veep decides to comply with Daddy Bauer and wants CTU on the phone.

In yet another lame cliff-hanger, as Jack tells Josh to get in the car to go back to CTU, he gets a phone call -- which turns out to be a diversion! Just then Silver Spoon grabs Josh and gets in a helicopter. Jack tries to get to Silver Spoon, but is stopped by all of the other CTU agents.

Seriously. Can't you just wait for the next two hours to be over? I bet Evil Veep is, since he was ready to go to war with some country in the Middle East, but now has to start planning on a war against Russia. Oh my, the suspense is killing me!!!

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Episode 22 Predictions/Running Commentary

There are only three hours left in the worst season of 24. Yes, the worst. With more and more banter popping up around the media outlets about how bad it truly is, the Executive Prodcuer on the show has promised the viewers that the finale will be something that will revitalize 24 and reinvent it. They're trying to hook us on Season Seven already since they gave up on this season about 20 episodes ago.

So they have three hours to close up all the gaps and STILL "hook us" for next season. What are those gaps, you say?

  • Brother Palmer's injury
  • Sister Palmer and her wanna-be terrorist boyfriend
  • Karen and Bill's marriage
  • The Nadia/Silver Spoon love angle (since Milo is dead)
  • The Chloe/Morris love angle
  • The Jack/Marilyn love angle
  • Audrey becoming sane
  • Heller giving in to Jack's desire to be with his psycho daughter
  • Daddy Bauer's ultra-patriotism
  • What the hell ever happened in Denver?
  • Poor Man Rob Lowe's testimony
  • Invasion Chick's Hornball boyfriend
  • Evil Veep's nasty sexual story line
  • Fish's allegance to who?
  • Chang and the component
  • CTU being held hostage
  • The Russians starting WWIII
  • What ever happend to Logan?
  • Jack's acid-washed hands
  • Jack's propensity to eat flesh rather than real food over the past 21 hours

As you can see, there's a lot of ground to cover in three hours. What do YOU think will happen this week? And if you watch the show in "real-time," feel free to leave comments here and I'll incorporate them into my write-up.

Monday, May 07, 2007

24 Season 6: Episode 21 Recap
(Hour 2:00 a.m. - 3:00 a.m.)

WARNING: The following post may, and probably will, contain spoilers.

As the season winds down, we're inevitably "treated" to more suspense and twists – because that's what this season really needs, more twists. The sad part is that in this sixth season of 24, they have to explain everything to the viewers. It's not about us figuring it out on our own, they have to guide us along... because we're stupid. Do you all want a cookie? You deserve one for watching this episode.

CTU – The Most Under-Protected Government Agency EVAR!!!
Five minutes after Heller put the smackdown on Jack, he's still stunned. Nadia goes to visit Jack and informs him that Heller has left with Audrey (who apparently doesn't need to undergo any other medical treatment right now). Nadia also reiterates that Heller wants Jack to stay away from Audrey – alert, that means that something will happen to Audrey and/or Heller and Jack will HAVE to help either of them soon... thus getting him out of the doghouse.

The clue that Audrey gave Jack panned out. CTU has the place locked down and is awaiting Chang. Jack pleads with Nadia to let him go with the team because he's, everyone say it with him, "the best chance CTU has at stopping Chang." Nadia throws the fact that Jack disobeyed a Presidential order and that's why the component was stolen (again, not really... Evil Veep hadn't been sworn in at the time and Brother Palmer's order still stood). Jack curses at Nadia and says he want revenge on Chang, but she won't budge. She warns him to not try and escape or she'll have him put in restraints. Um, why isn't he in restraints anyway? Nadia was handcuffed when everyone thought her to be the mole, but not him. He needs to remain un-cuffed for some reason. Jack thinks maybe he can help from CTU... YOU'RE UNDER ARREST IDIOT, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO HELP ANYONE.

Suddenly, Chloe is seen back at her desk – guess it wasn't too necessary to point out that she was missing for a few minutes last week. Morris has spotted Chang's hummer with some weird x-ray type satellite and the new CTU-counselor Milo (who's hair is all disheveled now) asks Chloe if everything is okay. She says yeah, but he's not convinced. Morris butts in and explains the situation and tells Morris to stay out. Still, nobody cares.

Nadia briefs Silver Spoon's team about their mission and sums up how insanely dumb this entire season has been:

Russia will attack the US if CTU fails to recover the component. Think about that, if CTU fails to recover an out-dated Russian security component that can compromise their nation's security – the SAME component that the Russians stick into nuclear warheads that will ultimately detonate, thus destroying said component – Russia will attack the United States. This is the Counter Terrorism Unit, not some special ops group. If it's that important to recover, or destroy, the chip, why not send in every single military force you've got? Better yet, bomb the building that Chang is in. Case closed.

Silver Spoon tells Nadia that she's doing well and she exhibits a little Stockholm Syndrome by telling him to be careful. The ever-present not-doing-shit Milo sees her being nice to Silver Spoon and is discouraged.

Brother Graem's survivors are still at CTU. Josh is up watching the news and Marilyn is still looking fresh and hot for Jack. Josh goes all teen angst on the world and Marilyn does a great job of consoling him. Chloe walks up outside of their room with a transcript of her statement for review. Chloe tells Marilyn that Audrey is still alive and instead of asking who the hell Audrey is, Marilyn looks surprised... maybe because she really has no idea who Audrey is.

Chloe figures it would be okay to take Marilyn to see Jack – who's in holding since he's arrested. Jack explains to Marilyn the whole situation with Audrey and Heller. Marilyn then tells Jack that she and Josh are leaving in the morning (not now) and that she wants to bring Josh by. She also tells him that she'll be there for him after everything is over. Get off his nuts already.

Silver Spoon's men storm the building that Chang is in... but, oh no, it's the wrong one! Instead they find an aresenal of weapons. Silver Spoon calls in to Chloe and asks for Nadia. He tells her about all the weapons they found. Apparently, it's enough for a small army.

Meanwhile, in another building, The Attack Team (TAT) says goodbye to Chang and Computer Dude as they enter the sewer en route to their destination – CTU! Who saw THAT coming? A few minutes later, TAT shows up right underneath CTU – because sewers will lead anyone right underneath government agencies. They set charges and Computer Dude hacks in to CTU's security system to shut it down (this would be the second time that CTU's security was comprimised in 10 hours).

Milo updates Nadia about Bloomfield and then asks about Silver Spoon. Milo tells her that if there's something going on between her and Silver Spoon, it's okay. Wait, no it's not, because she'd be kinda slutty if there was. Nadia kissed you not six hours ago man, don't be a puss. Nadia doesn't know what she feels, it's been kinda a long day. Then Chloe tells Nadia that she found something on the satellite's back-logs – a nice angled computer animation that couldn't be from a satellite.

TAT's explosions detonate as CTU's security is compromised. Morris notices the system not responding correctly and suggests that it could be a hiccup in the server, but he can't figure out what's going on. Chloe figures out that Chang and his men went somewhere that was six blocks away from CTU. Then it hits Nadia, CTU is under attack and she orders a Code Red lockdown.

Morris still can't figure out how to get the system back online as TAT makes its way through CTU shooting people. Jack hears all the commotion and convinces the security guard to let him out. As Jack gets a gun and scores some kills, TAT demands to know who is in command. Milo steps up to protect Nadia. To bad for him, he gets shot dead – guess that means he can now go on to his new show next season. But more importantly, wow would they NOT know who was in command? If Computer Dude hacked into CTU's system, they'd know who was running the place.

Marilyn and Josh are found by the attack team, apparently they want Josh. Jack saves them and they start to leave CTU. They head down to the room where the syntox was released last season. Jack sends Josh up the ventilation shaft. TAT traps Jack and Marilyn and take them into custody.

Silver Spoon calls in and a member of TAT thinks they need to respond. The leader of TAT demands that Nadia stand up and confronts her about her actually being the ranking officer – then wonders why didn't he look at the roster earlier. He makes her talk with Silver Spoon, who berates her about taking too long and after they end their conversation. Then Silver Spoon suspects that something is up since Nadia is suddenly not all nice to him anymore.

Jack and Marilyn are brought down to the control room. TAT's leader talks to Josh over the loud speaker and says he'll shoot his mom if he doesn't show himself. Awww, he decides to save his mom and turns himself in.

BUT GET THIS... Daddy Bauer is behind all of the madness! He's fixing the circuit board in exchange for his grandson and plans to get into CTU. That double-crossing sonofa!

Oh, and then there's this stuff going on at the White House
Hornball is woken up by a phone call. Thirty minutes ago he was all excited and spry about getting laid and being a spy... now he's dead asleep? Invasion Chick calls to trick him into sending more intelligence to the Russians. She makes plan to go back home to have more sex and Fish explains how she's going to leave her pda around for Hornball to swipe. She says that she doesn't think she can do this and that she can't be with him again. Evil Veep chuckles.

For some reason, Fish goes with Invasion Chick to her apartment. Since they're making a big deal out of this, it's obviously going to go wrong. Invasion Chick heads inside and Fish calls in to Evil Veep to keep him briefed. She heads up to the door and Hornball surprises her by opening it for her... he's already suspicious, because she's tense. Hornball wants to "loosen her up," sicko. She says that she's going to freshen up first, but Hornball calls her bluff... he totally wants her. They do it.

Reader Comment
Got this comment from Jonk regarding this week's episode:

Just watching this week's hour....
Has anybody here played "24: The Game"? They are now stealing from the game. Literally plot point by plot point.

In case you haven't played it: CTU is attacked by some goons (including an Asian guy), a CTU computer geek is shot in the head in front of everybody, and Kim must stay away from the baddies by hiding in the air vents. Also, come to think of it.... like the video game, Jack picked up a better weapon every time he came across a dead body.

Wow. The writers are now stealing from the video game? Then how is it that this season was such a challenge to write? This it pitiful and ridiculous and HARDLY what an "Emmy award-winning" show does.

Thank God there is only three hours remaining, I don't think I can put up with many more "twists." However, I actually can't wait to see what the writers have in store that will make the entire series shift in a different direction. Oi vey.

Sunday, May 06, 2007

Episode 21 Predictions/Running Commentary

There are four more hours in this awful day. Thank goodness it's not daylight savings, I couldn't handle an extra hour. So what extremely "plausible" thing(s) will happen in episode 21? And, if you'd like, feel free to post comments here during the episode for me to include in my recap.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

LA Times: Is '24' running out of time?

Like I've said over and over again, 24 isn't doing so well. It's sick and has been for the entire season (I'd even argue that it was sick the last two seasons, as well), but after Salon's rant about the show and now the LA Times article, hopefully America will realize that 24 is a has-been. The article is called "Is '24' running out of time?," and it talks about how the fans are tired of the re-used plot points, how 24's ratings are dipping and the median age of viewers has increased.

Interesting. So you're saying that as more and more older people watch 24, the show becomes dumber, we're allowed to re-use plot lines and focus on torture? I'll tell you what, I don't think that's the best way to follow up your Emmy-winning season.

But what might be more telling is this quote from Executive Producer/Writer, Howard Gordon:

"I don't dispute it's been a challenging season to write for us. But it's reinvigorated our determination to reinvent the show. This year could be seen to be the last iteration of it in its current state."

How exactly was it challenging to write the show? Did FOX come in with a list of requirements?

  • Three pointless love triangles
  • Presidential assassination attempt
  • Nuclear bomb explosion on US soil
  • 25th Amendment
  • Endless chain of enemys
  • Introduce 7 characters that fall off the face of the Earth after a few episodes
  • Recovering alcholic
  • Mole in CTU
  • Jack has to bite someone to death
  • Whatever else sounds implausible

Please. And don't try telling us that there's a twist coming up for the finale which will change everything. No one's buying it, and apparently, 1/3 less of your viewers from the first episodes are watching it. Have fun doing all of your writing and tinkering, but you're not half as clever as you think you are.

But if you really want some ideas on how we can get back to the root of the show and make season 7 better, then please, take some of my suggestions.

Monday, April 30, 2007

24 Season 6: Episode 20 Recap
(Hour 1:00 a.m. - 2:00 a.m.)

WARNING: The following post may, and probably will, contain spoilers.

Let's see... where did we leave off. Oh yeah. Chang got away and Jack's been arrested. Audrey's mind is f'ed and the horny Evil Veep doesn't want anything to do with Brother Palmer's initiatives – if you can call them such a thing. Karen and Bill are having a lovers' quarrel and there are a few other things that no one cares about.

Running CTU 101
Nadia hits the ground running by being a mega bitch and giving orders to everyone. Morris comes in to talk about his request and Nadia denies the transfer (didn't see that coming) because they're in the middle of an international crisis – which isn't another government agency's job, if you were wondering.

Silver Spoon calls in and tells Nadia that Audrey is all sorts of screwed up. Nadia orders him to bring her back to CTU so one of their specialists can take a look at her. Silver Spoon tells Nadia what Jack's plan was and then tells the audience again that Jack is a hero because he was going to sacrifice himself to get Audrey released (thanks for beating it over our heads). Jack's plan would've worked, too, if it weren't for that pesky dog and those meddling kids if he wouldn't have messed it up. Nadia said that Jack went against a direct order from the White House – need I remind everyone that he really didn't since Brother Palmer okay'd the task at hand. The only directive that wasn't followed was Silver Spoon's, and that was to arrest and detain Jack.

Karen calls Nadia to tell her that the Russians know about the missing component. Audrey hasn't said anything yet, but that might be because The Shrink (Dr. Bradley) just showed up. Karen then emphasizes that it's super important that they catch Chang – you know, the thing that they were already trying to do. Karen says that if Nadia needs more resources, to ask. Nadia responds by saying they need Bill. Burn.

The Shrink meets with Nadia and acts all dick-like because he's on a "time-crunch," I guess because he has so many other patients to see at 1:20 am. The Shrink starts talking to Audrey and notices some weird spots on her arms. Meanwhile, Silver Spoon puts Jack in a holding cell as Jack begs him to take care of Audrey.

The Shrink continues his overview and Nadia interrupts him to introduce Silver Spoon. She explains that they're getting pressure from the White House to find Chang and that they need information from Audrey – which means that Jack will have to end up talking to her. The Shrink says that she's a type 3 catatonic that's capable of following simple commands and repeating words and basic phrases. Basically that means there's not much he can do unless there's an intervention, which is a fancy way of saying he wants to inject her with more drugs. The Shrink insists that this is the only way they're going to get information out of her... but wait, resident shrink Silver Spoon says that Jack can get through to her. The Shrink says that talking to Jack would likely upset her and when it's all said and done, it's not Nadia's call, district has put Audrey in his care. Silver Spoon gets pissed and tells Nadia to stop him and teaches her Running CTU Lesson #1:

Sometimes you gotta do whatever it takes... to break the rules.

Silver Spoon tells Jack that it doesn't look good and then releases Jack so he can go to Audrey. But first Jack has to make it look like Silver Spoon was attacked – never mind the cameras that are in every room. Jack uses the sleeper move on Silver Spoon and then knocks the rent-a-cop out. He grabs a gun and then makes his way into Audrey's room to choke The Shrink. Audrey leaves with Jack as The Shrink pulls the fire alarm.

Nadia rushes to Morris' computer and they pull up the video feed... sure enough, Audrey's gone. Nadia orders for everything to be looked down and Milo gives her Running CTU Lesson #2:

If only you had let Jack do what he wanted, none of this would've happened.

Morris confirms that Jack is still in the building. Nadia notices that Chloe is missing (but never follows up on it) and asks Silver Spoon, who is already back awake and on his feet, what the hell is going on. She practically nails it on the head as to what went down and Silver Spoon says he did what was necessary for the operation and for Audrey. Morris finds Jack in the lower levels and Nadia sends every one down there... except the Entry Team.

Jack gets into a room and then sabotages the door – luckily he doesn't have flashbacks as to this possibly being the room where his wife died. He sits Audrey down and tries to reason with her by reciting her life story. Nadia makes it down to the room but can't get in because it's jammed and learns Running CTU Lesson #3:

Always have the Entry Team ready.

Jack tells Audrey that he wants Chang to pay for what they've done to her and it looks like she starts to remember. He says all the right things, including a crash-course in getting over being tortured, and that's when Audrey grabs his nasty acid hand... we call that a breakthrough. Then the Entry Team busts in and Audrey finally says something. The Shrink is pessimistic, but Nadia takes note of all she learned that day and takes a chance to do things Jack's way. She sends Audrey back upstairs to the medical wing and Jack goes back into holding.

As the White House Turns
Karen briefs Evil Veep on the progress of finding Chang. Apparently, CTU is dedicating all of its resources to find them. Neither of them is hopeful that Chang will be found before he gets out of the country and it's near certain that Russia's defenses are doomed – ALL BECAUSE OF THIS OUT-DATED COMPONENT OF A NUCLEAR BOMB. Evil Veep then shows compasion about Karen's firing of Bill and tries to bury the hatchet by telling Karen that he values her work.

Invasion Chick goes home and is acting all suspicious-like. Then out of nowhere, she starts making out with Hornball (Bishop). Uh-oh! Again, out of nowhere, it appears that Invasion Chick is playing Evil Veep! She has her own hidden agenda

Evil Veep, Karen and Fish meet with Russian President Suvarov and he busts their balls about the component being stolen. Fish suggests that there MUST be a spy and is going to launch an immediate investigation into the staff. The situation is really serious and Evil Veep says to give CTU everything they need to find Chang... little does he know that they've already dedicated all of their resources to find him. For an government agency that complains about being shorthanded all the time, they sure do have a lot of resources at their disposal, I think.

Invasion Chick tells Hornball that she's going to shower to wash off their 5 minute sex romp. While she does that, Hornball swipes her PDA and downloads everything off of it in 2 seconds. He then calls Foreign Dude in Car (FDC) to tell him he's all done and that Invasion Chick has no clue. GASP! Another hidden agenda!?! Ten minutes later, Invasion Chick is all cleaned up and takes a call from Evil Veep – he's disgruntled (read: horny) and wants her to get back soon. Hornball wants to know what's going on and calls FDC to find out his next move.

Fish comes in and tells Evil Veep that he's identified the leak. Someone on the staff called Hornball a few times over the past two hours and this guy has possible ties to Russian Intelligence in the past... but the investigation was stopped due to a lack of resources. Fish says it's Invasion Chick. Evil Veep is dumbfounded and tells Fish that he's sleeping with her. Fish is speechless and then offers a potential back-stabbing ploy.

Invasion Chick shows back up, so Fish leaves and lets Evil Veep confront her about knowing Hornball. He then plays a taped message (from ten minutes earlier) from Hornball calling a known Russian intelligence agent (FDC). He's all pissed about her lying to him and he says that even if she didn't know she was helping, it's still treason... which the writers now want you to think, "oooo, that's ironic since you were trying to commit it earlier!" But don't fall for it. It's a cheap gimmick. Evil Veep tells her that she is to go back to Hornball and tell him that they've retreived the component.

Aw Hell-er!
You heard it here first, Heller is back and sitting with Audrey. He then tells Nadia that he wants to see Jack. Heller goes in and tells Jack to never go near Audrey again. It's all Jack's fault that she's a vegetable and Heller keeps telling Jack to stay away from her because he's cursed. Duh.

Miscellaneous Crap

  • Did anyone wonder about the two helicopters just sitting there at the beginning of the episode? Last week weren't they needing helicopters to chase Chang? If there were two right there, then why not continue the chase? Oh, because they want you to think that the ONLY lead is Audrey's swiss cheese brain.
  • Speaking of Chang, we only see him once this week hauling ass in a hummer. He starts to upload the contents of the nuke component to a computer, but there's a problem – the circuit board is damaged and can't be fixed without a security override. Now they have to find someone with expertise. Which basically means, don't worry about us this episode, we'll be back soon enough.
  • Morris and Chloe meet up in the hall and he tells her that he asked for a transfer. Chloe gets all upset and Morris tells her it's over and they're done. Good thing they're worrying about this and NOT catching Chang. Unfortunately, this won't be the end of that story line.

Wow, that was the lousiest cliffhanger I've ever seen. How would you ever follow that up? How about uncovering yet another terrorist activity – this time by the Chinese. Oh, and we finally figure out where Graem's wife went... does anyone remember her? You do? Do you still care? You do? Then I can't help you.